Photo Credit (Pixels)
“We want to wear what we want, but we don’t want to get it wrong.”
What does “ageless” clothing really mean? Is worrying over the size of my bum in pants a sign of self-loathing? Nearly fifty-year-old Viv Groskop negotiates the challenging realm of midlife fashion.
Growing up in the 1970s, I never would have thought much about over-50s fashion or what I would wear if I were lucky enough to survive to witness such heinous decay. But if I had, I would have pictured myself donning long-line ribbed cardigans with big, elaborate buttons, comfy Clarks shoes, and what my late grandmother referred to as “slacks”—elasticated-waist pants.
Vera, my 52-year-old grandmother, loved to think of herself as “smart,” but she also made sure that she followed the norms of what was “acceptable” at the time. The majority of her clothes were purchased from Marks & Spencer or charity shops. Finding used goods from Jaeger, Windsmoor, Planet, or – the holy grail – Dannimac was the fantasy of every charity shop.
She did have a sense of style, and on sometimes she wore really statement earrings. However, she was aware of what brands would suit her needs and what she was “allowed” or “supposed” to wear. Clothing was enjoyable.
As I approach 50, I’ve come to realize that all of those dependable “grandma labels” have either vanished or are only available in a different form: BHS (which closed in 2016), Debenhams (which merged into Boohoo.com in 2021 after going bankrupt), C&A (which is still in business throughout Europe but its final UK locations closed in 2001), and Jaeger (which is currently carried by M&S). In 2018, House of Fraser shut down thirty-one of its fifty-nine levels and was acquired by Sports Direct, who now operates the Frasers flagship store in Wolverhampton.
Simply put, it’s “clever dressing”—highlighting your greatest features while camouflaging your less-than-ideal ones.
London’s Wyse Marielle Wyse
In 2018, Dannimac was dissolved as a stand-alone business, however JD Williams continues to use the Dannimac trademark. I am tempted to get the padded dark khaki gilet, which is now on sale for £76, in memory of my grandmother, which astounded me. (59-year-old Trinny Woodall, whose 1.2 million Instagram followers drool over every word of her style advice, claims that everyone needs a gilet.)
What should you, therefore, wear on your 50th birthday? Does the retail idea for that population even exist anymore? One of the few companies catering only to women over 50 is Hope Fashion, which was started in 2015 by Nayna McIntosh, a former M&S head of store environment. Following the withdrawal of two investors, Hope recently turned to its 20,000 customers for crowdfunding. “Hard to attract funding from predominantly male investors,” according to McIntosh.
Many companies who have become strong rivals in the post-midlife crisis industry never highlight their target age, preferring to project the idea of an ageless clientele: Boden, Mint Velvet, Me+Em, Toast, Sosandar, Jigsaw, Anthropologie, Autograph at M&S.
Ageing women who don’t want to feel like they have to “give up” are clearly drawn to Trinny Woodall’s constant promotion of the concept of “ageless” beauty and fashion. However, it seems to me that most brands rarely have direct conversations with older consumers because nobody likes to be reminded that they are an older customer.
But I also hear women quite upset about conflicting cultural messages. On the one hand, people in their 50s want to feel free to dress however they like. However, they also want to be reassured that they belong to a “special” group. Additionally, they worry that whatever they choose to wear will be perceived as “wrong.” It seems like becoming older has two distinct meanings: it might be completely meaningless (“We’re all ageless now!”), or it can be extremely meaningful (“So much empowering wisdom!”). It’s unclear.
The fun factor has been removed from clothes buying by overwhelm. Social media is overflowing with fashion advice, there are a ton of new companies, advertising, and shopping options (online vs. offline, rental vs. secondhand, etc.), and there’s a lot of competition, which makes people afraid of looking foolish. This is evident from the numerous pleas for assistance in online stylist forums. “Is it really acceptable for me to wear a tangerine trouser suit?” “Bet Lynch, is this much leopard print too?” Is it too late for me to get married?
Though it has been rephrased, the idea of “mutton dressed as lamb” has never truly disappeared. Instead, people are now too self-aware to discuss it. Comparably, it has been over 30 years since Arabella Weir’s character in The Fast Show questioned whether her posterior was oversized. Even though we are aware that asking this question is inappropriate and leads to self-loathing and body-shaming, it persists.
Stylist Natasha Musson, 48, of Somerset, works with women who are decluttering their wardrobes and are in their 50s, 60s, and 70s. Frequently, these ladies feel as though they have nothing to wear despite having an abundance of clothing, and they subsequently feel bad about it. She claims that their primary issue is that clothing buying has grown difficult and draining.
The days of simply going out for the day, dancing around, discovering something new, and returning home content are long gone. We are constantly being taught what to wear and how to wear it, and we have seen it all on social media. This increases the stress of attempting to maintain your composure as you become older.
Her primary goal, in her opinion, is to lessen her clients’ “overload,” which includes an excessive number of garments, a lack of storage space, and the pressure to purchase more. She works around people’s preferences for the clothes they currently own that hold the greatest personal significance for them. Whenever you make a purchase, make an investment in “better basics.” She says it’s rather easy: “You won’t be stylish if you’re not comfortable.”
Teacher turned stylist, activist, and podcast presenter of Menopause Whilst Black, Karen Arthur, remarks, “As a woman in my 60s, I get more compliments on my style than I did in my 20s or 30s.”
She retired from teaching ten years ago after thirty years of service, and her aunt passed away. On social media, she started sharing information about the connection between her mental health and sense of style, writing, “I was diagnosed with anxiety and depression – and I realised I was menopausal.” She discovered that keeping her aunt’s most treasured clothes was the only thing that made her feel better while she tidied up her apartment.
Humans are not served by those rules. They just assist those looking to take advantage of us financially.
Stylist and podcast host Karen Arthur
“She liked well-made clothes more than fashion. I was very drawn to her C&A pleated skirt and this St. Michael maxi skirt. Even though I didn’t feel like getting dressed most of the time at the time, I would reach for those items because I missed her. I therefore began discussing that using the hashtag #wearyourhappy.
She claims that until she really understood that she just didn’t “care what other people thought” and started dressing however she pleased, it took her “about another seven or eight years.” She then donated 95% of her clothing to charitable organizations.
Many people experience anxiety in the lead-up to their 50th birthday, including the amount of “stuff” they have amassed over the course of their adult lives, the environmental cost of that goods, and the realization that these things are insignificant in the face of millions of people relying on food banks. Although these issues are not exclusive to those over 50, they can become more significant as one ages. According to sustainability thinktank the Hot Or Cool Institute, by 2030 the average UK shopper will still be purchasing 27 new products annually despite austerity and the economic fallout from the pandemic. (According to its calculations, nine new things every year should be the maximum.)
The founder of the online retailer Collagerie, Lucinda Chambers, was the fashion director of Vogue for 25 years. She states: “People are looking for ‘this one thing,’ whether it is extremely expensive or extremely inexpensive, because there are too many options otherwise.” That is the reason why shopping is become so unpleasant.
She and her co-founder Serena Hood of Collagerie believe that true value is found in a superb edit of high-street and designer products. Hood is a thirty-something ex-Vogue model. They regularly curate online collections of home and lifestyle goods. Their picks may include a £1,950 Burberry trench and a £2,850 Raya sequined dress (grandma would faint) in addition to items you might really purchase, like a strikingly similar £39 trenchcoat from H&M or a £26 stripe sweater from Zara.
According to Chambers, her personal style hasn’t altered in 30 years. At eighteen, I sewed all of my own outfits and wore vintage when I started working at Vogue. Everybody else was wearing Chanel, or something similar. I’ve always felt out of style. Her own grandma, she recalls, was dressed in “an olive green crew neck and Jaeger stretch pants.” (My grandma would have given everything to discover this in a thrift store.) She thinks, “Oh!” as she passes by women in their 60s and 70s. Getting ready every morning is giving her so much joy! She continues, “These women are unique because they’ve figured out what fits them and they dress only for themselves, not for other people’s approval.” Style, according to her, is so life-enhancing that it is worth the trouble.
But what if something seems “too old” on you? That’s what Chambers claims is in your head.
Being instructed what to wear makes trying to look put together and a little older more difficult.
Musson Natasha
Her own ploys? Choose a product from a company that you truly like and fit, then stick with it. “The only pants that fit me are toast.” Choose colors that go well with you; in Chambers’ case, that’s khaki and navy rather than pink and purple. “I have to consider if I will still love something I buy now when I’m eighty years old.”
At the age of 49, Marielle Wyse founded Wyse London eight years ago. “I really don’t perceive any difference from ten years ago in terms of what I’m wearing and my style, even though I’m almost sixty,” Wyse remarks. “I believe that style never goes out of style. Simply put, it’s “clever dressing”—highlighting your greatest features while camouflaging your less-than-ideal ones. At any age, that is something that ought to occur. Someone will say, “You have to wear a miniskirt,” and it will be fashion. And I wonder, “Who says I have to?”
In her 70s and 80s, Wyse claims to have seen some of the most fashionable women around: “They frame themselves, they tailor themselves.” You simply frame your shoulders better since they droop as you age. This is another one of Trinny’s tricks: employ shoulder pads, or examine a jacket’s shoulder padding carefully.
Wyse responds, “Quality fabric.” Purchase less things. Purchase better. That will always have an amazing appearance. Occasionally, her brand does recognize a trend: “Three years ago, I would have said, ‘No, I am not going to wear mustard.'” We now own a scarf in mustard. Thus, you do give these items a gentle nod. (It’s a £150 “ochre” cashmere scarf.)
Because apparel rarely appears as amazing in photos as it does in real life, shopping on Instagram may frequently be disappointing. Furthermore, many of the styles are targeted at possible Love Island contestants. However, it remains the ideal spot for stylists over fifty, for inspiration, and for antique and used items.
Women over 40 are a wealthy and influential group, according to Wyse, who can afford to spend more on clothing. They may still purchase black pants and a white shirt from Zara, but for special occasion purchases, they also want something with a lovely print, cut, and fabric. Importantly, though, that does not imply that the clothing is “for the older woman.” “A large number of our clients are mothers and daughters. The daughter borrows it; the mother purchases it. They wear and style it in different ways.
Karen Arthur continues, saying that it’s worth the effort even though it’s difficult to ignore the deluge of contradicting marketing slogans: “I think it absurd that there are so many “rules” on social media posts. “You cannot simultaneously display your legs and boobs.” “White stilettos and black tights are not appropriate.” This is what an over-40-year-old should wear. Really, fuck off. Humans are not served by those rules. They just assist those looking to take advantage of us financially.
her own guidelines? “Observe your areas of affection. Make sure your underwear, which is the first thing you put near to your skin, gives you a positive feeling. Examine your clothes one more time. Don’t wait for the best. Recently, the world experienced a pandemic. Because we’re happy to be alive, we should dress like we’re having a good time every day.
Rosalind Donoghue, assistant to the stylist. Rom Sartipi’s hair is Oribe. Sophie Higginson used Tom Ford cosmetics and Noble Panacea for her makeup. Models: Susan, Evelyn, and Kelly at Mrs. Robinson
